My Beauty Shelf Is Full, But Apparently, So Is My Shopping Cart

I told myself this was the year I’d finally declutter my beauty pouch. Well, I finally started digging through it, and I wasn’t ready for what I found. Apparently, I shop for all ten of my personalities. My bank account is literally screaming at my past transactions, and now I’m just sitting here, lowkey drowning in a sea of products and my shelves are screaming for help.

I’m looking at stuff I used exactly once and bottles from back when matte lips were the only thing that mattered. It’s time to get real, here are my honest confessions as a full-blown, certified product hoarder.

The Lies I Tell Myself

I’m just minding my business, scrolling through reels, and suddenly BAM a sale banner appears. Sometimes the discount isn’t even that deep, but my brain immediately starts doing the girl math that would make Rachel Green proud.

I’ll look at a glitter pan I’ll never wear and tell myself, ‘Well, technically, I’m saving money by buying it now.But I end up spending on a product that’s just going to sit in my drawer! It’s a toxic cycle of me gaslighting my bank account into believing I’m ‘stocking up for the future.’ Truth is, I’m just a total sucker for a red strikethrough price tag!

I Bought It for the Packaging

We’ve all bought stuff just for aesthetic and vibe. I am a total victim of a minimalist font and a pastel bottle. I see a product that looks like it belongs on a pinterest board and suddenly I’m convinced. I’m not just buying a lip balm; I’m buying the lifestyle. Fast forward two weeks, now I’m just stuck with a half-used bottle of regret that I refuse to throw away because it’s still the prettiest thing on my counter. I’m basically paying rent for a bottle that doesn’t even work for me, just because the ‘vibe’ is 10/10.

Those tiny sachets that come free with every order, those mini samples, they are my weakness. Every time I’m at checkout and it asks me to ‘pick two free samples,’ I feel like I’ve won the lottery.

But I refuse to actually use any of them because I’m ‘saving them for a special occasion’. What occasion?! It makes zero sense. Yet, they’re everywhere! At the bottom of my handbag, stuffed into my travel kit and where not. I’m a total sample hoarder, and it’s a problem.

Nostalgia is a Dangerous Drug

At this point I have so many alternatives for the same product because one is never enough. I’ll find myself staring at a half-dried-up matte lipstick from three years ago, and a delusional part of me thinks, ‘But what if matte lips come back tomorrow?’ I’m out here keeping products like they’re family heirlooms. I know for a fact that the formula has probably separated into three different layers, but I keep it ‘just in case.’ Just in case of what? I’m making these confessions to keep it real, but please, I am begging you, do not actually use these expired products. They belong in a museum or the bin, not on your skin!

So, here I am, sitting amidst my hoard, finally realising that I only have one face and twenty-four hours in a day. I’m going to try, really try to keep only the products that I actually need. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with a trash bin and some very old liquid lipsticks. Wish me luck, and please don’t be me when it comes to hoarding products!

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